L'shanah Tovah Tikatevu V'Tehatemu!!!

By Rabbi Helene Kornsgold
KOACH Rabbinic Field Worker

Each year I think about the greeting above which Jews extend to each other during the High Holidays, from Rosh Hashanah through Yom Kippur. When I shop for cards for the New Year I thoughtfully ponder the message written in each card. I consider whether the words in the card convey the actual greeting I intend to send. Perhaps you do the same. If not, this article may provide you with a new idea to think about in relation to speech in general.

What is the significance of the language of the above greeting? Over the years I have noticed there are some cards which leave out the final word, "V'tehatemu" – "and you should be sealed." The reference here is to the Book of Life. Is there actually a difference in meaning if I send out a greeting without this word? Is it not acceptable or not enough to greet someone and say, "For a good year may you be written" (in the Book of Life). Does the word which means "and sealed" add any significance to this phrase? Granted, ideally I know it makes more sense to stop the greeting at "Tikatevu" – "and you should be written" – on Rosh Hashanah, because this is the holiday when we are written in the Book in Life. Yom Kippur is when our decree is actually sealed so it beckons adding the word "V'Tehatemu" – "and you are sealed."

If I only wish you L'shanah Tovah Tikatevu before Rosh Hashanah, am I implying that I do not want you to be sealed in the Book of Life? After all, they do sell cards with the full saying. If you send this card before Rosh Hashanah then it is a way of acknowledging and wishing others a happy new year for the entire season. One may read this and think this greeting card example is a ridiculous illustration of the power of words. However, surprisingly, whether I use the most simple or most complex example, the end point is the same. The words I utter, as well as those which I do not, can impart hurt upon another individual. Has it ever crossed your mind that refraining from saying a word or two may also have the power to harm someone?

Words are extremely powerful, with the power to create or destroy. However, we do not take our words seriously enough, we throw them away thoughtlessly. We will soon gather in the synagogue to hear Kol Nidrei. The stirring piece of music which signals to us that we have reached the last lap in our spiritual marathon and the period of self-reflection is coming to an end. Vows in the ancient world are just one example of the deep significance attached to words.  We all make vows of some type, flippantly, which we may have the good intention of keeping at the time, but over time are forgotten. "I'll call you later.  Let's do lunch."  These are simple, broken promises, broken because we do not hold ourselves accountable for the words we utter. We do not believe that mere words are important. 

Soon we will also recite the Vidui, the confession section, of our prayers. In this public confession there is a long list of sins which we confess to have committed. Of the 43 sins enumerated in the Al Het, 11 are sins committed through speech and language. Although one may think these types of transgressions are not as grave as stealing or committing fraud, in our tradition, these are amongst the most severe transgressions.  Some of the concepts in the Al Het list are familiar terms to many of us – lashon harah, evil speech and rekhilut, gossip or tale bearing.  The strict definition of lashon harah is not a lie, but something negative about another person, even though it may be the truth.  The Talmud tells that the tongue is an instrument so dangerous that it must be kept hidden from view, behind two protective walls (the mouth and teeth) to prevent its misuse.

As Yom Kippur approaches, when you are in synagogue and reciting the long list of sins in the Al Het, think seriously about the last time you said something that was hurtful to someone; what you might have said instead, or possibly, if you could have said nothing. Think back to the last time someone said something that hurt you. How did it feel? Did hurting you accomplish anything? Could the same point have been made choosing other words? Whether or not the words we are referring to are in a greeting card we buy, an email we send, or simply the actual words we speak to others, let us never forget the power of our words!!

L'shanah Tovah Tikatevu V'tehatemu!!!!

[Posted 9/8/10]