The Jewish Olympics

Oyga Vault:
A sound-enhanced Pole Vault competition, the vaulter must clear the bar then yell "Oy" upon hitting the foam pad below. Any heights cleared without an "Oy" will be considered a fault. Points will be added for more enthusiastic exclamations of "Oy," such as "Oy vay iz mir!", "Oy, I've just landed on my shana punim!" or, the winner in the Olympic trials', "Oy, such tsuris this is causing me!"

Team Handball:
The goal here is simple: to create the ideal matzah ball. Each team will cook a two liter bowl of matzah ball soup, from scratch. The three winning batches will be fed to the athletes recovering in the infirmary. The toughest matzah balls will be used in the shot put competition.

Triathlon:
This year's Triathlon will involve one pound of shnitzel and a serving of tsimmes. The athlete must cook the shnitzel and tsimmes (first part), say a bruchah before eating this kosher meal (second part), and then run a marathon (third part). If the contender forgets to say the bruchah, he/she will be disqualified, but will still be required to run the marathon.

Bagel Toss:
A kosher version of horseshoes, the winner is he/she that first lands a bagel on each of the seven branches of the chanukiah.

Challah Chap:
How long does it take you to remove all the chometz from your house before Pesach? In this competition, each participant must rid a miniature shul of all of its challot, and replace them with matzot.

Naches Shlep:
Designed for bubbies and zaydehs, the proud grandparents will have two minutes to boast about their einiklach (grandchildren)

[Posted 6/11/10]