New Traditions

By Stephenie Carlson
University of Missouri, Columbia

One phrase I've heard many times is probably familiar to many: "The best way to learn is by doing." Another one that has stuck with me is similar: "The best way to learn is to teach."

They both make sense, separately and combined: You can't successfully learn something unless you do it -- go through trial and error, if you will. If you can't teach, if you can't go through the step-by-step process to give others the knowledge you've gained and the assurance of knowing that you're not shooting the arrow blindly, have you really gained anything at all?

I didn't grow up in a Jewish household. I don't have childhood memories of candles being lit on Friday night, of kiddush being chanted over wine and I had my first bite of hallah a little over a year ago. Only in March of 2007 did Shabbat begin to mean something to me and play a role in my life. My interest in Judaism began long before that, but the little-to-no experience I had participating in Jewish activities and traditions seemed to limit the knowledge I had in books.

My first steps in the Jewish community were taken on a Shabbat, although I think it would be more fitting to say I threw myself into it and then took my first steps. The first service I attended at the Hillel on my campus was, in all honesty, one of the most nerve-wracking and beneficial steps I had ever taken. The relationships I've built, the memories made and the experiences I've had all stem from that night. Needless to say, all of these are still growing and taking shape, but the seeds were planted then. The words of advice and the guidance I received when I was at a loss helped me greatly and I've carried them with me since.

Beginning to celebrate Shabbat at home required my own knowledge of the actions performed and the reasons why. The responsibility and task of establishing a Jewish atmosphere each week in a non-affiliated household laid on me. My first Shabbat at home was a teamed effort with my mom, but I became the teacher, explaining the "why," "why not," "how-to," and "wait, let me make sure I answered that correctly." I realized the learning didn't stop, even when the teaching began. (Ten months later it still hasn't stopped.)

I know the steps I've taken in my past and present are leading me to where I'll be in the future. And yes, I know that's rather corny and we've all heard it said before, but it's true in so many ways. Applying that thought to my plans of living a Jewish life now and in years to come brings me back to my first Shabbat at Hillel and my first at home with my family. It makes me think about the first Shabbat I'll celebrate when I have my own home, eventually with my own family, and all the steps in between. I still have a way to go and I'm aware of that, but I've got plenty of time to prepare along the way.

Stephenie Carlson is a sophomore at the University of Missouri-Columbia, currently majoring in Psychology and hoping to focus exclusively on neurology. When she's not consuming all the Coca-Cola products on campus, rushing to class, and studying like a madwoman, she can be found consuming all the Coca-Cola products at the Hillel on campus, buying whatever catches her eye at the bookstore and cursing her impulses later when facing all her new books that still haven't been read six months later.

[Posted 2/6/08]